Fearless love
He turns around, searching a tight sleep. Maybe this was his tenth turn, but he could not yet sleep. He completed his bottle of water that he kept aside, and it has already been more than an hour he has been trying to sleep, but he could not sleep. He looks at the clock, that displays the time 12.15. Tomorrow is not Saturday, he knew he had to wake up on time to go for his regular office, and his regular task, but he could not sleep at all!
Only, the words from Sharmila’s sister kept moving from her. It had been hours that she told him. He probably had wet eyes too…
***
Three months back,
As soon as Prabeen shifted to his new room at Sinamangal, he saw young lady from his window of his new room. This young lady was thin, beautiful and ever smiling. She used to be at her roof top and keep talking, sometimes singing and sometimes even did not mind to dance assuming no one has seen her. Prabeen used to enjoy seeing her and that had now been his daily routine.
After being back from office, he used to sit on the chair that was faced towards the next house, and used to look after her entire activities. One day, when Praveen was at his rooftop, she noticed him. Praveen could realize it, and he said nothing but smiled. She smiled in return. This smiling relation continued almost for a week till Praveen gathered the courage to ask her name…
‘Sharmila’ she said.
‘And yours?’ she asked again.
‘Prabeen!’ he replied.
There could not be any long term talk that day, and gradually every evening they used to sit on their own terrace and used to had a chit chat. It had been more than months, and that had been their routine. On the rainy evening, they used to talk with umbrellas on their head…and that was moving gradually.
Prabeen could sense that he has been falling for her, and maybe even she was falling for her. Or not, that could simply be Prabeen’s assumption which necessarily need not to be correct of course. Five minutes delay from Sharmila’s side would make him such uneasy as if he was having kind of altitude sickness. But, no matter how late it was, she used to come.
People around began noticing their regular activities. Prabeen’s landlord once even said that she was not his type of girl, and it would rather be better if he stopped talking to her, but how could he? He could not stop talking to her. Their talks kept on continuing.
One week back
Prabeen’s friend was in his room for some chit chats. Prabeen’s friend saw the girl, and immediately asked in surprise who she was. Prabeen had no word to define the relation though’, and he said she is my friend.
‘But…she…’ he could not speak firmly,
‘What?’ Prabeen asked.
‘She is a prostitute!’
‘What?? You must be wrong!’ Prabeen said is surprised!
‘Oh come on! I had sex with her, I remember her because she was the only one whom I saw not allowing without condom! I said I would pay her thousand bucks extra, but still she did not allow! She is the same girl! I swear!’
‘If that was the thing, she should have told me earlier!’ Prabeen thought, and made a determination to ask her, if it was true…’ But asking her if she was a prostitute was not an easy tasks.
‘What do you do?’ Prabeen asked.
She tried to escape from the topic making various excuses, she used to make fun of her question explaining ‘I cook, I eat….I sleep and finally I shit!’
It was getting tough for Prabeen, and yesterday evening he saw a girl similar face of that of Sharmila with her. He could clearly say that it was Sharmila’s younger sister. Sharmila introduced him to his sister later from the roof top itself, and with just ‘Hi’ she ran away.
Today morning,
It happened that Prabeen was getting out in his bike, when Sharmila’s sister was out of her gate as well.
‘Where are you going?’ Prabeen asked.
‘College!’ she said.
‘Where?’
‘Bagbazar!’
‘Come on! I will drop you, I am going to Putalisadak!’
Although she felt uneasy, she accepted a while later. On the way he then asked her,
‘What does your sister do?’
She immediately changed her face, he could depict it from the mirror of his bike, and said,
‘Why do you need? Don’t care about that!’
‘Please, can not you say it?’
‘No! Why do you need it?’
‘I love her!’
‘Shut up! Don’t even think of that! And stop the bike, I want to get out of here!’
‘But, why? Cant I love her?’
‘No! You can’t! And yes, don’t ever say that to my sister! My sister is God for me, and I cant tolerate some one playing with her emotions!’
‘But why cant I love her?’
‘I said na, you cant love her!!’
Few minutes of silence took the place, and then she started…
‘After our parents were killed by Maoists, my sister brought me to Kathmandu. She got involved in dance bars, and later she got into prostitution just for my sake, she has not studied a single class, but she earns and spends her entire amount for my education. Thinking I will have negative image if I stay with her, she sent me to hostel.. I can never pay her debt in my life…she began with tears!’
Prabeen could not say a word. At the time of departing they exchanged each other’s number and then she went to her college.
Sometimes truths are better hidden. But after knowing the truth, what could he do? That evening he could not talk properly with Sharmila. His cigarettes nearly burnt his finger.
***
Only, the words from Sharmila’s sister kept moving from her. It had been hours that she told him. He probably had wet eyes too…He had no idea what to do.
Should I marry a prostitute? What will the world call me?
Are all prostitutes bad?
Should I avoid her just because I came to know her truths?
These sort of questions kept revolving around, and his mind was entirely occupied by things similar to this, it was already 1 am, and his eyes could not even think of being closed...and in the end he pulled his cell phone from his nearby pillow, and typed:
dwaiipon.blogspot.com
He turns around, searching a tight sleep. Maybe this was his tenth turn, but he could not yet sleep. He completed his bottle of water that he kept aside, and it has already been more than an hour he has been trying to sleep, but he could not sleep. He looks at the clock, that displays the time 12.15. Tomorrow is not Saturday, he knew he had to wake up on time to go for his regular office, and his regular task, but he could not sleep at all!
Only, the words from Sharmila’s sister kept moving from her. It had been hours that she told him. He probably had wet eyes too…
***
Three months back,
As soon as Prabeen shifted to his new room at Sinamangal, he saw young lady from his window of his new room. This young lady was thin, beautiful and ever smiling. She used to be at her roof top and keep talking, sometimes singing and sometimes even did not mind to dance assuming no one has seen her. Prabeen used to enjoy seeing her and that had now been his daily routine.
After being back from office, he used to sit on the chair that was faced towards the next house, and used to look after her entire activities. One day, when Praveen was at his rooftop, she noticed him. Praveen could realize it, and he said nothing but smiled. She smiled in return. This smiling relation continued almost for a week till Praveen gathered the courage to ask her name…
‘Sharmila’ she said.
‘And yours?’ she asked again.
‘Prabeen!’ he replied.
There could not be any long term talk that day, and gradually every evening they used to sit on their own terrace and used to had a chit chat. It had been more than months, and that had been their routine. On the rainy evening, they used to talk with umbrellas on their head…and that was moving gradually.
Prabeen could sense that he has been falling for her, and maybe even she was falling for her. Or not, that could simply be Prabeen’s assumption which necessarily need not to be correct of course. Five minutes delay from Sharmila’s side would make him such uneasy as if he was having kind of altitude sickness. But, no matter how late it was, she used to come.
People around began noticing their regular activities. Prabeen’s landlord once even said that she was not his type of girl, and it would rather be better if he stopped talking to her, but how could he? He could not stop talking to her. Their talks kept on continuing.
One week back
Prabeen’s friend was in his room for some chit chats. Prabeen’s friend saw the girl, and immediately asked in surprise who she was. Prabeen had no word to define the relation though’, and he said she is my friend.
‘But…she…’ he could not speak firmly,
‘What?’ Prabeen asked.
‘She is a prostitute!’
‘What?? You must be wrong!’ Prabeen said is surprised!
‘Oh come on! I had sex with her, I remember her because she was the only one whom I saw not allowing without condom! I said I would pay her thousand bucks extra, but still she did not allow! She is the same girl! I swear!’
‘If that was the thing, she should have told me earlier!’ Prabeen thought, and made a determination to ask her, if it was true…’ But asking her if she was a prostitute was not an easy tasks.
‘What do you do?’ Prabeen asked.
She tried to escape from the topic making various excuses, she used to make fun of her question explaining ‘I cook, I eat….I sleep and finally I shit!’
It was getting tough for Prabeen, and yesterday evening he saw a girl similar face of that of Sharmila with her. He could clearly say that it was Sharmila’s younger sister. Sharmila introduced him to his sister later from the roof top itself, and with just ‘Hi’ she ran away.
Today morning,
It happened that Prabeen was getting out in his bike, when Sharmila’s sister was out of her gate as well.
‘Where are you going?’ Prabeen asked.
‘College!’ she said.
‘Where?’
‘Bagbazar!’
‘Come on! I will drop you, I am going to Putalisadak!’
Although she felt uneasy, she accepted a while later. On the way he then asked her,
‘What does your sister do?’
She immediately changed her face, he could depict it from the mirror of his bike, and said,
‘Why do you need? Don’t care about that!’
‘Please, can not you say it?’
‘No! Why do you need it?’
‘I love her!’
‘Shut up! Don’t even think of that! And stop the bike, I want to get out of here!’
‘But, why? Cant I love her?’
‘No! You can’t! And yes, don’t ever say that to my sister! My sister is God for me, and I cant tolerate some one playing with her emotions!’
‘But why cant I love her?’
‘I said na, you cant love her!!’
Few minutes of silence took the place, and then she started…
‘After our parents were killed by Maoists, my sister brought me to Kathmandu. She got involved in dance bars, and later she got into prostitution just for my sake, she has not studied a single class, but she earns and spends her entire amount for my education. Thinking I will have negative image if I stay with her, she sent me to hostel.. I can never pay her debt in my life…she began with tears!’
Prabeen could not say a word. At the time of departing they exchanged each other’s number and then she went to her college.
Sometimes truths are better hidden. But after knowing the truth, what could he do? That evening he could not talk properly with Sharmila. His cigarettes nearly burnt his finger.
***
Only, the words from Sharmila’s sister kept moving from her. It had been hours that she told him. He probably had wet eyes too…He had no idea what to do.
Should I marry a prostitute? What will the world call me?
Are all prostitutes bad?
Should I avoid her just because I came to know her truths?
These sort of questions kept revolving around, and his mind was entirely occupied by things similar to this, it was already 1 am, and his eyes could not even think of being closed...and in the end he pulled his cell phone from his nearby pillow, and typed:
Love does not have any boundary, after knowing her entire truths, I came to this decision. I love her more than yesterday and I will love her forever.
He sent it to her Sharmila’s sister, and finally managed to sleep. He watched the screen of his cell phone till it was delivered and then finally closed his eyes. There was a beep after sometime indicating SMS in his cell phone, but he was already asleep!dwaiipon.blogspot.com
